My Boyfriend is Now My Brother
by You'veGotMeAndJesus
Summary: I am going to do something that I doubt anyone else has tried to do in this story. If you have, I appologize. What, you might ask? I'm going to turn Eli Goldsworthy into a Christian. ; Obviously this is one of those stories that is going to involve Christian content. You have been warned. Also, I do not own Degrassi or anything involving the show in any way.
1. Confessions and Misconceptions

***Author's note: Hey, everybody. Just wanted to let you know that these first few chapters are going to be a little short. However, I will compensate for this in two ways: (1) They will start getting longer and (2) I have already written the entire story, so you won't have to wait for me to update it. I guess that's it so thanks :) ***

Clare P.O.V

Dear Diary,

Okay, confession time. My boyfriend is now my brother. Now I know what you're thinking; she's back together with Jake. This isn't exactly uncharted territory, right? Wrong. What I'm talking about definitely qualifies as uncharted territory. Anyway, my story begins on the morning of September 13th. I ate my breakfast and then rode to school with Jake, as always, since Eli no longer had a vehicle. We walked through the doors together and went our separate ways in the hallway. I was expecting to see Eli at my locker, where he waits for me every morning, but to no avail. I waited a few minutes, then decided to text him.

"Eli, where are you? Are you at school? "

"No. Home sick =("

"Aww =( Feel better, okay?"

"No worries, Clare Bear. I'll be better by tomorrow. Promise =)"

"Okay. I'll try to get through the day without you then :("

"Do your best =P"

Even when he was sick, he was still smug. So that was that. Eli was sick. Or at least that's what he told me…


	2. Pity Party

Eli P.O.V

I couldn't do it. I just couldn't do it. I got up and got dressed to go to school this morning, but I just couldn't make it out the door. And to make matters worse, I lied to Clare. I felt terrible aabout it, but I couldn't tell her the real reason I stayed home today. One of our major issues when we dated the first time around was that she thought I was still too hung up on Julia. What would she have said if she'd known that I stayed home because it's Julia's birthday? It'd be like the spring break fiasco all over again! So, in order to protect my relationship, I told Clare that I was sick. I couldn't lose her again and she'd probably dump me if she knew the truth. Not that I don't deserve to be dumped.

All I do is hurt the people I love. I kill one, I lie to another. It's a never-ending cycle. I can't do anything right. I can't make this right. Julia is dead because of me. Instead of her parents and her family celebrating another year of her life, they stand in front of her tombstone mourning her death, because of me. The last moment I had with her was when we were fighting. The last words she heard anyone say to her were words of hatred and malice, because of me. There's nothing I can do to bring her back and there's nothing I can do to forgive myself. All I can do is lie in this bed, throw myself a pity party, and wait for this day to be over so I can pretend none of it ever happened.


	3. Worst Girlfriend Ever

***Again, I'm sorry about the short chapters. I really don't think that these chapters can be put together and I hate doing page breaks, personally. There are eight chapters in this story. Go ahead and read now! :)**

Clare P.O.V.

I carried on with my day the best I could without Eli until I got to chemistry fourth period. When I walked in the door, I immediately saw Adam sitting at our lab table. "Hey, Adam," I greeted cheerfully when I got to the table.

"You're awfully cheery today considering the circumstances," he responded.

"Yeah, I know. Poor Eli."

"Yeah, it's a shame he has to go through this," Adam commented.

Now I was slightly confused. "What do you mean? Yeah, it sucks, but he's not dying or anything."

At this, Adam suddenly dropped the test tube he was holding and it shattered into tiny pieces. The whole class was looking at us now. "Sorry, . We'll clean it up," Adam said.

Adam went to go get the dust pan and brook and then we were both on the floor picking up the broken test tube. "I cannot believe you said that, Clare," he whisper-shouted at me. Then I knew something was up.

"Adam, what are you talking about?" I questioned him.

"What are youtalking about?" he countered.

"Eli texted me this morning and told me he was sick," I explained.

"He's not sick, Clare," Adam responded, sounding slightly irritated. "Don't you know what today is?" I gave him a look that said I had no clue what he was talking about and he finally said, "Julia's birthday," in a condescending tone.

"Oh my goodness."


	4. The Expected and the Unexpected

Clare P.O.V

'Well, it's official,' I thought. 'I'm the worst girlfriend ever.' As soon as it hit me, I bolted out of class and out the door. I had no idea how I could forget something like this. There I was all happy-go-lucky Clare and I didn't even realize that the heart of the boy who had mine was currently broken. Could I have been any more selfish? I was still being selfish because I was still acting like this was about me. I didn't matter at the moment. The only thing that mattered was getting to the Goldsworthy house as fast as humanly possible.

After what seemed like hours, I finally got to the door. I knocked with such vigor that the door cracked open on its own. I didn't even check to see if CeCe and/or Bullfrog were home: I just went straight for the stairs, took a deep breath, said a little prayer that God would prepare me for what was behind that door, and slowly opened it to find a heartbreaking sight.

Eli P.O.V

The day was almost half over and I still didn't feel any better. It's not like I expected myself to though. I know how this stuff works. This happens every time we have an anniversary, the date of her birth, or the date of her death. The world goes on like normal and I just lie around in my room all day and feel sorry for myself. My parents tried to console me at first, but even they now know that I'm a lost cause. I was expecting to continue the rest of my day as previously stated, but that plan was ruined. Little did I know, that alteration in my plan was going to change my life forever.

***Dun dun da! What's going to happen next? Read and find out! Review please! This is my first published story so I really would like your feedback on my writing :) * **


	5. The Witness

***Alright, guys. Here's a really long one to make up for the first few that were extremely short. This is where we're going to start getting spiritual. It's gonna be a little upsetting, and really deep. Please note that anything I'm having Clare say about God is something that I truly believe myself. If anyone has anything they would like to say about that, or questions to ask, he/she can talk to me. Thanks :) ***

Clare P.O.V

When I went in his room, his head was buried in his pillow and he had his radio on pretty loud. Due to these factors, Eli didn't even notice that I came in the room. I slowly walked over to his stereo and turned the music off. When I did this, I could hear the sobs coming from my brokenhearted boyfriend. I couldn't take it anymore. I put my hand on his shoulder so that he could acknowledge my presence. His head finally left the pillow. He looked up at me and I could see his bloodshot eyes and tear-stained cheeks. I could feel a tear escape from my own eyes at the sight of him.

"Clare," he managed to choke out before he began to cry again. At that moment, I dropped to my knees an pulled him into an embrace. "It's all my fault," he kept repeating in between sobs. I held him close and ran my hand through his hear in a comforting gesture. It broke my heart to hear him talk like this.

"No, honey, it's not. It's not," I told him, my voice cracking slightly as well.

He let me go, put his feet on the floor beside me, rested his elbows on his knees, and folded his hands. "Clare, you know the story. We had a fight, she rode off on her bike, and her mind was so clouded by the hateful words I said to her that she rode right in front of a car. Please enlighten me on how that is not my fault."

I took another deep breath before I spoke again. "Eli, you had no idea that was going to happen. Yes, you said some terrible things to her and it's okay to regret those words, but everything happens for a reason. It wasn't just a twisted and random thing, Eli. It was planned this way. You have to learn to forgive yourself. Forgive yourself the way God has forgiven you."

Eli let out a dark, sarcastic chuckle before he spoke. "God. Clare, I've always respected your religion and everything, for you. Don't go preaching to me right now. Please."

"But Eli! Don't you understand that you can't do this alone? That's why you still feel this way. You keep trying to make yourself feel better; get rid of the guilt, the pain, and the shame; but the reason you're getting nowhere is because you're trying to do it yourself!"

"I've been getting along just fine without him. If God really did plan everything, including Julia's death, how do you expect me to follow a God like that?" he questioned, and rightfully so.

"The reason God gives us tragedies, like Julia's death, is so that our faith in him will be stronger," I explained.

"That's ridiculous!"

"Eli, look at everything I've been through in my life. I've always been made fun of every since I was a little girl. Whether it be because of my vision, my uniform, my dorkiness, or my faith. Even my own sister picked on me. I never got away from it. I thought I would be little miss Saint Clare forever. Then, when I changed my image freshman year, and again sophomore year, the teasing stopped, but now the pain. KC brought my heart out of its shell and proceeded to crack it into a million pieces. Along with that, I had to deal with the fact that my best friend stabbed me in the back.

"A few years before that, my sister tried to commit suicide. She went to a party and got roofied and date raped. Said sister is currently in Africa and I hardly ever get to talk to her. Fast-forwarding back to freshman year, when I once again opened my heart to bad boy heart throb. I thought he wanted to be my friend, but he was just using me.

"Sophomore year, my parents decide out of the blue that they are getting divorced, and everything I thought I knew changed. I no longer believed in happily ever after. I thought we were this perfect little Christian family. Come to find out my father cheated on my mother multiple times and is currently living with the other woman. As you very well know, my world got out of control. Shortly after that, I almost lost one of the most important people I had in my life. Said person scared the crap out of me and I had no choice but to abandon him in his time of need. Broke my heart."

At this point, I let a few tears fall and Eli kissed them away as I continued with my story, giving my hand a reassuring squeeze. "After that, said person decided to write a play about me." At this, we both chuckled. "Then things got pretty crazy. Around the same time, my mom finds a new boyfriend, oh whom just so happened to e my new boyfriend's father. Awkward," I said as we chuckled again.

"During that saga, I lost my best friend. And, of course, the relationship between my step-brother and me had to end. A little while after that, I unknowingly moved into a week house because of my stupid step-brother/ex-boyfriend and my mother. After this, my friends and I, and my significant other, all came back together.

"Just when I thought everything was going right in my life again, an oh-so-wonderful man by the name of Asher Shostak made his way into my life. I was taken advantage of, again, and I lost and internship that I loved and my opinion of a man I'd once idolized. After that, I decided to open up to Mike Dallas, of all people, instead of my own boyfriend. I got drunk and my secrets came out. That's why he brought me the beer as a birthday present, Eli."

"Okay well I'm glad that finally got established," he said.

"I'm sorry. I was at the stage where I was going to lose my mind, and I just wasn't thinking."

"It's okay, Clare. You were under a lot of stress."

I gave him a warm smile as appreciation for his understanding and continued." Anyway, the point of telling you my entire life story, of which you've already heard or already knew about, what this: if I'd had to handle all of this on my own, I don't know where I would be right now. You always tell me how strong and brave I am, but in reality, none of that is me. Everything you see that is good in me comes from God. If I didn't have Him in my life, I'd be just like everyone else. I can't survive without Him, Eli."

"Exactly. The same things happen to you that happen to those who don't know God. So why do I need him?"

"Despite what a lot of people think, Christians are not perfect, nor do we lead perfect lives. If we were, we wouldn't need him, you're right. Being a Christian isn't about being perfect. It's about walking the roads that Jesus walked, and if you come to a few bumps and block along the way, you handle them with God's grace and wisdom. And once all your trials and temptations are over, you can be with Him in paradise."

"Get real, Clare. I'm not good enough for paradise."

"You're right, Eli. You're not. Neither am I. Neither is anyone. That is where Jesus comes in. Even though you don't think you can be forgiven, it's already been done. God sent his son, Jesus Christ, down to Earth to die on the cross for us. Every sin that we have committed, and even sins we haven't committed yet, was known by God before we were ever even born! Jesus died for these sins, and because of him, we get to come into heaven as white as snow. He can wash it all away, Eli, but you have to let him."

**Pretty intense, right? What do you think so far? Let me know :) ***


	6. The Prayer

Eli P.O.V

Clare was giving me a lot to think about, in all honesty. I know she really believes in what she's telling me, it's just a matter of believing it myself. It all sounds wonderful, but then again, anything that comes out of this girl's mouth automatically sounds wonderful. I've been through so much and I've done so much wrong. It's pretty amazing to hear that God doesn't care about any of it, and that in the end, I can come to heaven with a clean slate. But it can't be that simple. Can it?

"Clare," I finally spoke after several minutes of just thinking. "This all sounds great and all, but how does it work?"

"It's fairly simple, Eli. All you have to do is confess, believe, trust, and obey." This sounded like gibberish to me at first, then she explained herself further. "You have to confess your sins to the Lord in prayer. Tell him you are truly sorry for all of your sins, you believe that He sent his son to the Earth to save us from our sins, and ask Him into your heart. If you pray this prayer and mean it with all that you have, you will be saved."

"Simple as that?" I questioned.

"Simple as that," she responded. "Now comes the trust and obey part. After you've been saved, you can't just say, 'hey I'm saved! I can do whatever I want now!' You have to read God's word and do the best you can to abide by its teachings."

"Aww, more homework?" I asked with a smile.

"Yes, Eli. If you're gonna do this, you have to take is seriously. Again, this doesn't mean you have to be perfect,. It just means that when you make mistakes, you ask God for forgiveness. Now, the trust part is definitely the hardest part. When you ask God into your heart, you are giving yourself completely to Him. Your life is no longer your own. It's not your way, it's God's way. You have to let go of every plan you have for your life and trust that God will put you in the right direction. You have to pray for his help and his guidance and trust that he will hear you. And when tragedy happens, you have to trust that it was in his plan for a reason and that some day you will be with him in a place where there will be no more sorrow."

"Will you help me?" I asked her.

"Of course I will, Eli," she said with another warm smile.

"Okay," I responded with a smile of my own.

"You have to make sure you are doing this for the right reasons. You can't do this just to impress me. You have to really mean the words you say and really give yourself over to him.

"I know, Clare. Would you…"

"Would I what?"

The words sounded really odd coming out of my mouth, but it was time that they did. "Pray…with me?"

I swear I have never seen her smile so brightly in my entire life. "Gladly." She sat on my bed criss-cross-applesauce style, and I followed suit directly across from her. She took both of my hands and closed her eyes. Then she began to pray.

"Lord, I thank you for giving me the opportunity to witness to one of the most important people in my life today. Thank you for giving me the words to say and I pray that they've sunk in. I also pray that you give Eli the words to say as well. Help him to see how truly amazing and awesome you are. Now I believe that Eli has some things he would like to say to you. Amen."

I took that as my cue to take the reins, and began my prayer. "Um…God? I don't really know what to say right now, so I'm just going to say what's on my heart. I thought I was doing fine on my own. Sure I have my problems, but so doesn't everyone else, right? I thought I could handle it, but my beautiful girlfriend sitting across from me so blatantly told me otherwise. It took a little time, but I think I'm starting to realize that she's right. I can't keep living my life the way I want to because if I do, it won't get me anywhere. And I want to get somewhere. I want my life to have a purpose. I've done a lot of things in my life that I shouldn't have done. I've committed a lot of sins and I am truly sorry for that. I believe that you sent your son to Earth to die on the cross for my sin, and that s truly amazing to me. I'm not worth that. Thank you for believing that I'm worth something. Ever since Julia, I've had issues believing that. I'm tired of feeling so guilty all the time. God I ask you simply to set me free. I'm ready to let go of my life and sign it over to you. Please come into my heart and take me under your wing. I pray that you help me to trust you and learn from your word. Help me to love you from the inside out, Lord. Amen."

After I was done, Clare let go of my hands and wrapped her arms around my neck. It wasn't until I heard a sob escape from her throat that I realized she was crying. "Clare, why are you crying?" I inquired.

"I'm just so full of joy, Eli. I'm so happy for you!"

"Thanks, Clare."

"Don't thank me. Thank God," she said with a smile before she got up off the bed, kissed me chastely, and made her way out my door.

When the door shut, I unfolded my legs and leaned back with my hands under my head on the pillow.

"Thank you, God."

**Well, there you have it! Elijah Goldsworthy is now a Christian. Let me tell you, it was pretty hard to write. The talk about religion was easy, but setting it up was the tricky part. I have one more very short chapter left and I'm done. Opinions please? :)**


	7. My Brother

***This is it, everyone! I had so much fun writing this story and I'm so glad that you have taken the time to read it. Again, if anyone has any comments about anything involving this story, please review. If it has to do with the religious aspect of this story, I recommend you send me a message. I will not be judgemental or anything. As the song that my pen name is based off of states, "by your side through the fight you will never be alone on your own. You've got me and Jesus." -Stellar Kart. Thanks for making my first published story a success! I have plenty more where that came from. It's just a matter of publishing them. You can read now. :)**

So I bet I had a lot of you confused, didn't I? Are you starting to get it now? I hope so. I've been praying for this day to come for quite some time. I always knew that he had bigger problem to deal with that he could handle, and I'm so glad that he's finally realized that himself. I really hope that his life is changed forever. I can feel that things are going to be different now and I can't wait to see what the good Lord has in store for both of us.

"By the power of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost I pronounce you baptized before the Lord today."

Well, there you have it, ladies and gentlemen. My boyfriend is now my brother…in Christ.

"And all God's people said…"

Amen.

***For those of you who were confused, the last two quotes are supposed to be from the pastor that is baptizing Eli. Also, this story is over. I will be writing more stories with Eli being Christian. I will also be posting some of my one-shots and song-fics that I have in my notebooks. Thanks for reading!**

**~You'veGotMeAndJesus **


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